and I am sure that my lack of blogging enthusiasm reflects it. CCAA matched six lousy days this month, SIX!! I don't know what the issue is with them and I really don't care.! It's been over 20 months, 21 to be exact and I am TIRED of waiting, way beyond tired of it. I am done being nice about and I want someone to yell at! Problem is, there is no one to yell at, no one who cares that this wait is unacceptable and will do something about it. We adoptive parents have no power, have no say. We just have to sit here and take it. UGH! Can you tell, not a good day at all!

CCAA has matched families up to December 8th. Not terrible, not great either. Oh well, here's to better news next month!
I've got to keep telling myself...One month closer.....one month closer....one month closer....

Rumors are starting to come out, that the cutoff for December of '05 is the 12th. Which would be a good thing. I can't help wonder, given the time of year, are we in for another Trick, or a Treat this month........I guess we'll find out soon!



CCAA has finished matching families up to 11/30/05. I am holding onto hope that things will speed up, but I don't have the rose colored glasses on anymore. I know full well, that CCAA is going to do whatever they want, still sucks though.
Because it just dawned on me that it took 6 looonnnnggg months to get thru November 2005.
Referrals came in yesterday, they made it up to 11/30/2005. YIPEE, that CCAA finally got it done, YIKES, that March 2006 seems almost as big. Even more disturbing, is that there are rumors floating around the IA community, that CCAA has matched thru December 2005 into January 2006, but are only sending out small batches. What up wit dat!!!
So, it seems that there really is a quota (though CCAA wont say so), so it doesn't "matter" how many babies they have ready, they will only refer out a certain amount. Makes sense, given the severe slow down and it is severe, only matching 6 days out of a month, one month at a time. What a friggin nightmare....

p.s. don't worry folks, there will come a day when I will post about happy things, Like endless sleepless nights, diaper blow outs and throw up ....:)
It's funny how these months are starting to run together. Because of it being my birthday, I didn't even realize that today was our 18th month log in date anniversary.
I guess turning 39 was good for something.......
It's so hard to believe, that it's been 6 years since 9-11-2001. It was a day of terrible loss and tremendous human courage. It was a day that was forever etched in our hearts and minds, for a time, bringing us all together as a nation. As horrific as that day was, it showed that we are at our best, at the worst of times. It also showed us, as in times past, how hate can destroy innocent lives. I don't think anyone with a heartbeat, will ever forget those images and prays that we never see a day like that again.
I had hoped that we would stay united as a country, but there are so many things that, yet again, divide us as a nation. When will we stop seeing each other as Christian, Muslim, Jew....Black, White, Yellow, Brown....and start seeing each other as human beings, each with their own right to exist, to love, to laugh, to just be......


As you can see from the image from the CCAA website, they have matched families with babies from 11/22/05 to 11/24/05. Four days of referrals, it stinks, but it is what it is. I just have to close my eyes and just keep repeating to myself...

"It's gonna be worth it.....it's gonna be with it...it's gonna be worth it.....

Even while saying that to myself, our hearts hurt and I wonder if it will ever happen.....*sigh* Rich says that if CCAA continues at current trends, we wont get a referall until Jan '09..ouch..hurts to hear it, but I am beginning to think he might be right....
it never told me what I wanted to hear....Will referrals speed up?..."can't predict right now"....Will there be a big referral match this month...."No"(GRRRR!!!)....."Will my referral come in '08...."Decidedly hazy, ask again later"..yeah, my whole life has been about "later", umm..lately.. (roll eyes)

So I put up a memory game!! YAY!!! So, have fun, I am off to watch
"Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon". Love this movie!! Love "House of Flying Daggers" too!, I am sucker for an ill fated love story.....
I just realized that today was our 17th month anniversary! What a drag...The wait just never seems to have an end. I know you guys must feel like I am constantly whining about it, but misery loves company :),
I cannot watch this video without tearing up. OMG it just says EVERYTHING!!! (just click the arrow)

Stephen Curtis Chapman and his wife adopted 3 girls from China, this is his song for them and about adoption.


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LOOK, just LOOK at these referral predications, made by the great Rumor Queen, based on current referral trends.



Ugh, talk about depressing, Crikey! By the time we get our daughter, we'll be too old to lift her, lol. In fact, she'll be pushing us around....around in our wheelchairs, haha!

Pray that these predictions prove to be way off, or I just may go off the deep end...lol.
The cut off date for this month is 11-21-05, whahhh!!!!


However, as disappointing as that is, there are babies that now have a family to love them and that's a good thing!

I asked the Magic 8 Ball is referrals would speed, it said

"Can't predict right now"

Figures.......
Since I last posted. Referrals haven't come in yet, probably in a few days to a week. Not alot of rumor out there, but the consensus is that 11/21 is the cut off date. So, that's 7 days worth of referrals, if it's true, which it probably is.
I can't believe it's been 16 months and one week, since we logged in with China. It just blows my mind, because when we started this process, the wait was 6 months, lol, we're way past that now!
Going on vacation in a week and a half, boy do Rich and I need it. We so need a break from everything adoption, the wait has just been weighing so heavily on our minds.

Here is a picture of the house we rented, isn't it purty!




I can't wait to go!!!!

(Can't wait for the day, when we can say we got ours)

The cutoff date for this month is 11-14-05, so that is exactly 7 days worth of referrals. Our agency did not receive referrals this month, their next LID date is 11-17-05, so next month those people will get their referrals.

Well, while the slow progress is annoying and frustrating, it IS progress and better than none at all. November is rumored to be a big months, so I am not really upset by the 7 days.

Anywho, that's my news for today!!




Yeah, Yeah, I know, why should we be happy about that! Well it sure beats being miserable for having waited this long with nothing to show for it, lol. Well, nothing except another year older and A LOT more gray hair, hahaha.

Honestly, I can't believe we have waited this long. I mean, I would have thought that I would been over the edge by now ( I am, but wont admit to it, deep state of denial). I wish I could say, we will definately have our daughter this date, or definately have a referral by that date, but what I am finding out about this process, is that there is no way to predict what will happen each month. You just have to have a little faith that things will work out the way they were meant to and just go with the flow....

I get asked a lot ( so does Rich) about how the adoption is going. It's so hard to tell people that you just don't know. One thing that I have to keep in mind, is that our family is waiting with us and even though it might seem like Rich and I are going this alone, we aren't really. We so much appreciate all the support we get...
I wish I could be more optimistic about it, but I wish they had done more. We are only 5 months away from November, but it might as well be 5 years.

Ugh, sorry to be such a downer....
Just when you think it's safe to believe the good rumors, the bad rumors come along and pull the rug from beneath you. It is being reported in China referral land, that CCAA has only matched up to 11-07-05. Not that I really "believed" that CCAA had matched families up to the middle of November, but it is still sucky to realize they haven't.

OH, OH, OH!!! We did get some good news today. Normally when you adopt overseas, you have to file a I-600A Orphan Petition. That is, getting approval to adopt a child overseas and bring them to the U.S. Well, when we filed the first time, the fee was $545, plus $70 a person finger printing fee. As of 7-31-07, this fee is going up to $750 dollars. Yeah, you read that right, not to mention having to pay $70 a piece for finger printing, it adds up quickly. Well, if we file again prior to our I-171H expiring, we won't have to pay the fee, YAY!!!
....have a way of making you crazy!

The current rumor(it's just that), is that CCAA is going to make it to 11/16, possibly up to 11/20 with referrals this time. While I would love to see this rumor come true, I know enough to know, that November is a big month and this is most likely NOT true. I wonder which part of me is the masochistic part that wants to believe this rumor, oh yeah, that would be my heart.

Anyway, I'll just be glad if they do more than last month. Hey, I'll take what I can get at this point, lol.
CCAA matched 6 days worth of referrals. Not crazy good, not sucky bad either. I think alot of parents were expecting the referrals to follow along the same lines as the last batch and are ecstatic that it didn't. I guess I am just relieved that CCAA was able to do more this time. Hopefully, CCAA will be able to do more in the months to come. November '06 is pretty big, as far as the number of people logged in to receive referrals. So, it might take CCAA a few months to get thru it. Speculation is that December, January and February are not so big, hopefully CCAA can get thru these months quicker. Of course, there is March'06, which is our month and rumored to be large. Our agency has 7 days of LIDS for March, the average for them is 4. So, while I know with every referral batch we get closer, I also realize that we are still so far away.

Oh, for my password challenged family, I have removed the need have a login ID and password. So you have no excuse now, HAHAHA!

*Edited to say*
If you choose to post anonymously, you will have to chose anonymous and make sure you put your name in the post itself or well..I wont know who you are, LOL. This I did, of course, because my family can't remember their logins or passwords, love you guys anyways! :)
The Good..

Referrals are in FINALLY..that's all I got to say about that.


The Bad...

CCAA only matched 2 days worth of referrals, 10/25 & 10/26. The rumors have been flying around lately, about how bad this month was gonna be. Even though the rumors really pointed towards just 2 days, I don't think anyone really believed it until today. Personally, I would rather get hit in the head with a board, than go thru another referral month like this one. Uh, but I do realize the closer we get, the more crazed Rich and I will be, LOL.


The Ugly....

Is that it will probably not get alot better. The bright side, I don't think CCAA has ever referred just 1 day, have they? I can so NOT go there right now. Wasn't a happy day today, but I can't say we didn't expect this, so it's time to move on and hope for better things next month..

Sorry that I didn't have better news today..."sigh"
Well, I am beside myself with jubilation!!! CCAA has posted on their site....that they have finished reviewing the dossier documents received before March 31, 2006


I am one happy chick!! Who woulda thunk that simple phrase could make two people so happy!!! This is really great news!!
Now that we are out of the Review room(I just love saying that), we will be pending referral!! Yeah, we got a long wait for that, but hey, we are getting good at it, (yeah right)
...in case you were wondering! I know I haven't posted in awhile, but that should clue you in on how unexciting my life is at the moment, lol. Nothing new to report, hopefully rumors will start to come in before the Chinese New Year. I hope everyone is well and dealing with cold and snow ok.
Punxsutawney Phil said there would be an early spring, because he didn't see his shadow. He better have been telling the truth...'cause we know where he lives.....

Hugs and smoochies

Jen
CCAA has finished reviewing dossiers registered with their office before 3/22. We missed being out of the review room by TWO days????!!!!!!!!! OHHHHH>>.. that just sucks big time!!!!
Now I have to wait a month or two more, to see if we are out?? One or two more months sweating it out!!!!!! I could just scream!!!!!
AAARRRRRGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
I think the news is goood. Everyone who logged in from 9/28/05 thru 10/13/05 received their referrals today. I know there are many happy families our there. That's an awesome 16 days of referrals!!! Does this mean a speed up, who knows(shrugs). Does this mean we are one step closer to our daughter, YEAH!!!

On a side note, we still don't know if we are out of the review room. Let's hope for good news in that area real soon!
I know I haven't posted in awhile, but there really hasn't been anything new to report since the last batch of referrals come in. It's the middle of the month and rumors are starting to trickle in about the cut off date of the next batch of referrals. ( I use this term hesitantly, since they are not rumors per say, but rather rumors of rumors). Anywho, bad case scenario would be a cut off of 10/10, good case would be 10/17. I am really not caring too much, I just want the referrals to come so CCAA can move on to the next group. One month finished is one month closer to us,,,
Went and saw Blood Diamond tonight, what a great movie. Leo Dicaprio has sure come a long way since Titanic, hubba hubba, but more importantly it kinda puts things in to perspective. I mean, how can I complain about the referral wait, it seems so trivial,when there are people being killed and enslaved in Africa for the sake of diamonds. It kinda makes a person sick, the pain and misery that greed can cause...

Well, I hope everyone is doing well, *hugs*
Love,
Jen
March'06 is still in the Review Room.....February is out. Hopefully we wont be in there too much longer, but the end of March is big (meaning alot of dossiers logged in)..so it might be taking CCAA awhile to get thru it. So we are sitting tight and hoping no questions come our way, that will hold up our dossier from going to the Pending Referral room, keep your fingers crossed.....


What does this mean, well, it means that any family who logged in with CCAA between 9/8 up to and including 9/27 of 2005 got their referrals today. While it's great that CCAA matched 19 days of LID's, they still haven't managed to finish September'05.
I guess I have to look at this way, its one more step closer to our referral.
However, I think I should prepare everyone, we most likely will not have our daughter by Christmas this year, our referral possibly, it's most likely that we will be traveling to China early 2008. I am not posting this to depress anyone, I just want you to be well informed also. The waiting will be hard, but last year went so fast, we can only pray this year will fly by also..

Ok enough of the sucky news and on to me posting pictures of the newest addition to the family, my greatniece Kalia (sp?) what a cutie!!!